Well we’ve reached the end of 2023 and it’s been a wild ride. So much has happened, even within the last month of when I last posted, and tbh I’m not in as good of a spot as I would like to be. I’m trying to drive the change that i’ve been wanting for myself, but in all reality, it’s been really overwhelming for me.
I just want to feel the way I was expecting to feel by making these major life changes. But instead i’m just all over the place, and I have to do it all by myself. It’s rough. Hoping 2024 treats me well.
So much is happening, I’m feeling every kind of emotions and I can’t sleep. I just want things to work out in some way, even if it’s not how I’m expecting. How can things seem so good and bad at the same time? It would be nice to just not think and feel so hard. It’s a blessing and a curse!
Saw Keshi live today and got triggered into my sad boi era lol. Took the time to look back at my old posts here and amazed at how things have changed since I started this back in 2013! Been 10 years and I somehow still ended up wanting to die somehow?! Not to say that it isn’t better than before, just haven’t had this urge in a long time actually haha.
Guess you can say life’s been kinda good? But also bad in other ways too sooooo whatever that means lol.
Wondering how I can still be sad like this with all that I’ve gone through to get to where i’m at. Not my total end goal but i’ve actually done a lot more than I ever thought I would so that’s kinda cool!
Funny enough, i’d still probably rather be dead lmao but I guess that’s also (my) life in a nutshell
I’ll probably be back with another post soon enough but my thoughts were different tonight so I wanted to vent a little for old time sake
